Nowadays, divorce has become a common resolution for troubled, shotgun and arranged marriages. An unhappy union may seek out a quick fix to end the frustrations of two people who don’t get along after they’ve said, “I do.” However, in Mark 10:9, the Bible makes a very clear statement when it says, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (As a side note, this includes meddling family and friends.)
Promises made to God should never be made lightly. They should be entered very seriously and with great carefulness. Deuteronomy 23:21-22 says, “If you make a vow to the Lord your God, you shall not delay fulfilling it, for the Lord your God will surely require it of you, and you will be guilty of sin. But if you refrain from vowing, you will not be guilty of sin.” Numbers 30:2 additionally tells us, “If a man vows a vow to the Lord, or swears an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he shall not break his word. He shall do according to all that proceeds out of his mouth.” Psalm 89:34 is one other passage that says, “I will not violate my covenant or alter the word that went forth from my lips.” As we can see, our spoken words are taken seriously by God.
Divorce is not God’s will. There are several scriptures that speak strongly about this separation between a man and his wife.
As said in Malachi 2: 16, “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
Luke 16:18 says, “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.”
In the Old Testament, Moses had laws for divorcing. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 says, “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.”
But in the New Testament its very clear, Matthew 5:32 says, “But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
Scripture tells us what the “rules” are, but we need to additionally realise the whys.
Marriage is a covenant that is new to both the husband and the wife and is a place where we will grow in many ways when we keep God as the center of the relationship. It doesn’t mean it will be easy though. We learn about selflessness, patience, responsibility and commitment in ways we never knew before. When children come into the picture, a solid marriage is important for their growth. While a home that only has one parent can be successful when there are other involved adults of the opposite sex in the child’s life, homes with only one parent are statistically proven to have greater problems than those with two parents in the home. Some of those problems include struggling in school, social and emotional struggles, and struggles to succeed in the work force.
While the ramifications of divorce are much deeper and far reaching that what is covered here, this should give us an idea of some of the reasons God desires marriages to be successful.
Differences and weaknesses are not enough reasons to divorce our spouses. Making a vow to the Lord needs to be our encouragement to give our marriages all we’ve got! If we took an oath before the Lord, we must do all we can to fulfill it.
Living in a world of computers, conveniences, and having quick access to anything we want, some may think successful and happy marriages should happen overnight. We enter our union with joy, but when the honeymoon period is over, marriage is a lot of work. BUT! It’s worth it!